Why Won’t My Snowman Stand Up?

Alright, I'm a little tired of this stupid snowman not standing up year after year.

So I purchased this snowman a few years back, and honestly, I got a great deal on it. It was originally a decoration that was roughly $160 and I was able to get it for sixty bucks on a Black Friday sale. Thinking I got a great deal, I soon began to realize that there might be a reason that it was marked down so much.

In terms of how the decoration looks, I mean it looks great, but there is a downside to how nice it looks when it's displayed. The problem with this godforsaken thing is that it does not like to stay standing up. Whoever designed it should be kicked if I'm being honest. The bottom is too narrow, and the slightest breeze will send this poor and innocent snowman falling facedown in the dirt.

They provided small little stakes to put in the ground to hold the snowman down, but they don't work, nope they definitely don't work! Every day during the holiday season I come home and this damn snowman is facedown. What I am to do? This year I moved the snowman to a different spot hoping that would assist in preventing him from falling, but here we are three days into the decorations being up and the snowman is on the ground.

The only thing that I can think of to keep him from falling over is to maybe mount the snowman to a piece of wood to give it some stability. The sad part is I actually like this decoration which is why I continue to pick this thing up off the ground so much. So I guess I need another trip to the home improvement store like I needed an excuse.